Friday, September 18, 2009

Late nights in AF and the ultimate gum-testing machine

So herrrreee's the thing: I decided this morning that I was coming home for the weekend. I know.

And we only just finished the first full week of schoolio. I fe
el lame-sauce to the max, but then again I counted up the times I came home last Fall and it was once a month. I figure I can count this time for September, come again in October, come for Thanksgiving, and then I'm home-free for December. Right? This thought process makes me feel not-so-lame. Please validate in comment section. Okay. That's off my chest now. Sorta. But now I'm faced with a predicament, as I sit on the comfy leather couches on the middle floor of my parent's house. I mean MY house. It's still my house! I don't like it when we have to start calling the houses we live in for free "our parent's houses." It makes them sound like some kind of hotel or something. No bueno. Back to the predicament: I do not miss Rexburg. AHH! I thought I was ready for this! I knew it was going to happen as I drove the four hours here and pulled it to my lovely town of American Fork. I knew it would happen as I saw my mom and little sis waiting for me in the driveway, and as I opened the pantry/freezer/fridge to lots of food. And as I saw how clean the kitchen was! Be still my heart. Be still. Wow, okay, so I'm venting majorly on you poor fellow bloggers. Forgive me. But I know that this experience is good for me.

This morning as I got ready for school, I put
on my favorite shirt (worn only once before) and RRRIP! It shredded. This is what made me decide right then to come home for the weekend. I could return the shirt to the store (they don't have one in Rexburg, duh!), retrieve things from my (long) list of forgotten items, see my wonderful amazing family that I love, watch the BYU football game IN Utah, and sleep in my air-conditioned room. Once it was decided, nothing was stopping me. Except for the few zillion traffic jams clogging up Utah on a Friday night. There sure are a lot of those! One more thing: in the past few weeks, being on this diet, I have been chewing a lot of gum. We're talking pancreas-killing-5-sticks-a-day gum chewing. My jaws are pretty much the strongest in the world. I don't know how you'd measure that, but I'm almost positive they could pull a train or an iron fence or something. And because I chew so much gum, I have learned which flavors are DA BEST. Or the ones that go hard in about 10 minutes or lose all of their juicy-ness. I think it's only fair that I share my findings with you, because then you won't have to agonize over which brand/flavor of gum you want when you're buying your groceries. Instead of buying all 5 brands (I did, but I have my reasons. All 500 of them.), you can just get the verrry best ones.

So here's what I've discovered...and I know this is ultra-random, but as always, for your entertainment only! Wooo!
Best Minty Gum: Stride Peppermint (new and improved! So good. Any flavor of gum by Stride is good, though.) Chewiness: perfect Flavor: lasted so long I got sick of it Texture: didn't get dissolv-ish. You know what I mean? Best Fruity Gum: Orbit Piña Colada
Chewiness: This gum is pretty hard at first, but if you have the jaws, you can work it, baby.
Texture: Great
Flavor: oh yummm!
Runners-Up: Extra Fruit Sensations Melon (I would only recommend this flavor of Extra because frankly, Stride is the neverending flavor champ. Sorry Wrigley peoples!), Orbit Sweet Mint, Ice Breakers Mint Cubie-thingies. They're just so dang delicious and minty!
Worst gums: 5 brand (ick), Extra (cept for the melon one), Eclipse...course, this is all my opinon. But remember...I am the gum-chewing expert of the world. That's a fact.

Wow. I can't believe I just did that! I just admitted that I came home after the first week of school, I chew almost a pack of gum a day (ack!), and I miss my parents a whole lot. Oh wait...did I say that? Guess it was a "between the lines" kind of a thing. Wink-wink.


Kristen Moss said...

I wanna know more about this diet. Can you post a "run down" (since your good at that)about your diet?

I would love to read about that.

Em said...

I never stray from Orbitz, I'm am a majorly dedicated fan. Buuttt...perhaps I'll give Stride a chance, based on your expert opinion. I just need my gum to LAST! I chomp pretty feverishly when I'm busy at work, and that can be hours 'n careful! If I get on a "gum kick" I can flare up a case of TMJD with "over mastication", er, heavy gum chewing.

JP Anderson said...

Stride hu? I'll give it a try next time I need to buy some gum. After borrowing, never to return again (ok I stole) some Trident gum Mom had in her kitchen drawer I've been pretty faithful to it. The pieces are one of the littlest I've seen, but you know what they say about small packages. They say they last the longest. Did you try Trident. If not, I'll have to say the jury is still out on the best gum. You should comment and tell us all the different ones you tried so were not staring at the ceiling all night in bed wondering if we should breakup with our current gum of choice.

shawn rowley said...

ok have to admit it i had absolutly no interest in the scienific study of gum. cold fusion. stopping the hyperplasia of malignat and necrotic cells, these things no longer interest me. and i find my self longing for a knot of sour apple bubble gum

i'm glad to have seen you last night durring the feeding frenzy of cougar meat. we will do better next time.

you will need to speak more than 16 words to me the next time i see you.

think of it as a personal goal, to think of what you could talk to your crazy uncle about for more than 16 words

Niki Purser said...

Wow McKenzie. I was excited to see that you made a post since I missed you this weekend. Too bad I can't go home for the weekends too for only like what.. 20 bucks for gas?! Jealous. So, I will say that I would really love to have your blogging skills. Mine are weak. So, I like the 5 brand gum, but I do agree that stride is amazing! Did you know that you could eat the wrapper? It dissolves, but the gum goes bad probably like three times as fast. Anyway, hope to see you sooner rather than later here in Rexburg! See ya!

Ging said...

I really haven't lived then. Here I thought I was superior with my 5 gume in the cupboard in its cool shiny wrappers and you go and blow the whole thing out of the water. I am going to the store...

P.S. it is cool to miss your parents

what was i thinking?! said...

Rudy - we love you in all your gum-chomping glory - Dad