Saturday, August 28, 2010

whoop, there it is!

Sore throats are so not the And whoever made up that phrase, well maybe they should have looked up first and made sure it wasn’t some al-Qaeda fansite. Because some people are gullible…cough…and think anything with a “.com” after it is actually a URL! Although I dunno why anyone would think that way.

Um so my ears hurt a lot. They aren’t feeling stellar, haven’t been for a week or so. They are as plugged up as the dam that the Danish boy babysat. No bueno.

And my cough is close to “whooping” (hence the title), but only in the morning when the allergens are workin’ overtime. Then at night the throat monsters attack and I can’t swallow. So that’s why I’ve been heavily drugged on Sudafed/Aleve/Chloraseptic as of late. I’m sorry if I vandalized your car or swore in my sleep or…gulp…forgot to floss (that was an apology to my teeth, btw). YES. I just blamed drugs for my problems, on a family blog. I did I did I did. Sorrrry.

Lately on this here blog I have been waxing reminiscent. Whoa English major word. But sometimes, like now, at 11:30 at night, my stream of consciousness begs me to let loose a little bit and write what’s really going on in that grey matter. Particularly on the right side of the grey matter.


I’m stickin’ it to the man. And the man right now…is the stuff in my throat. Please dissolve soon so I can shleep. And let me write a happy list, mm kay?

1. Blueberry buckwheat pancakes with almond butter, say what? Yeah it’s THAT good, just go eat it and un-wrinkle your perplexed face (but don’t get me wrong, the wrinkles look good on you).

2. Trampolining at 10 o’clock at night, under the big dippah

3. Flowy dresses with fun patterns

4. Hitting appliances to make them work. What, you’ve never done it? Look me in the eye and tell me the top of your TV has never met the palm of your hand! Yeahhh, that’s what I thought.

5. 80’s hits, like: Don’t You Forget About Me, 867-5309, Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go (who doesn’t want to wake up to THAT? Honestly.)

6. Cheddar-cheesy Hallmark films. They make me cringe with over-joyed-ness sometimes. Especially the Christmas ones, oh man.

7. That bite in the air when you know autumn is coming…

8. When inspiration strikes, and it strikes you good. I’m talkin’ about when you are right about to fall asleep in a fog of cough medicine, staring up at the board slats underneath the bunk bed, and then you think, “Oh my gash! I know exactly what I’m going to do this semester!” Like a lightning storm in December, I tell ya.

9. Bon Appetit magazine. Oh and FOOD magazine( the Martha Stewart one). Better throw in any Rachael Ray, Barefoot Contessa, or Jamie Oliver Cookbook.

10. Spying on children while they color. They get really into it, their tongues sticking out, eyes slightly crossed, sometimes they even give the stick people voices. It’s awesome.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

i just want to unwind in my time machine

Oregon always feels like a million miles away.
But really it's only 15 hours.
I think that maybe it's because every place I go to in that state
has some memory connected to it,
and memories that old feel far away.
We have to dive really deep sometimes
to conjure them up.
Places like...

The curb by Dayspring Fellowship,
where I tied my shoes before
embarking on another brutal River Walk
(all in the name of wrapping paper, yo).

The church with the kite-shaped roof,
where I showed mom my Ton of Reading
gold medal for the first time.
Funny how things that seem so huge
when you're a 5th grader
just end up in your closet years later.

Anywhere near Archie Lane, where I grew up
with my best friend, Liz.

River Road Park, which is all remodeled and
modernized now, but "back in my day,"
it was completely made of wood.
I think I spent 75% of my summer days
in that park
or getting dunked under the water at the pool
by certain persons who will remain unnamed.

The River Road Chapel,
where mom taught us that first year of seminary.
Where we met early in the morning for
scripture mastery, amazing race games,
and donuts.
I tried to find all of the secret hiding places
in that building (there's a lot, btw).

As we pulled out of my grandparents' driveway for what
could be the last time {in Eugene},
I started thinking about
how much of me is in Eugene,
and vice-versa.

And that made me kinda sad, because
I don't think I'll be going back for
a long time.

This time, for the 15-hour drive back home,
a few old memories from growing up there
started to take shape
in my brain...

watching Rugrats while mom fixed my hair and I waited
for the bus to take me to kindergarten

the smell of Pert shampoo and Irish Spring Soap...
every time I smell it I think of
Grandma Neda's house.

retrieving the wiffle balls from the other
side of the fence
when Ikey hit them over.
I wonder why he never got them...

going to Christmas fairs with my mom
and sometimes Cheryl (lizzy's mom),
Once they caved and bought us
one of those ridikkilus
cinnamon rolls.
You know, the ones
as big as your head.

going to many soccer practices
but hardly ever playing in any games.
all of them were on sunday,
offf course.

The wave pool with expensive tubes for rental...
of course, we knew that all you had to do
was wait until someone dropped theirs,
and it was game time, baby.

the old brown furniture in the front room
at 311 Mint.
I jumped on it, made fake commercials on it,
sneakily ate on it,
and yes, once I peed on it.
But I was sleepwalking, ahem.

the many trips to the Oregon Coast.
this time when we visited
I tried to take my time walking on the sand,
looking at starfish,
and breathing in that fishy smell.
the scrapes on my legs from the tide-pool-incident
are almost gone....

Camp Alpine--from the first time I visited
at age 8, to the last time at age 15,
I always said I'd rather go there
for summer vacation than
Because at Disneyland, you can't
share a 2-man tent with 6 girls,
prank the 3rd year's latrines,
wear ridiculous beanies,
eat dutch oven deliciousness,
leave mail for your secret sister,
get lost on an unmarked trail,
swim with water snakes,
go on a solo hike at sunset,
or make up jingles all day long.

watching the following shows
which aren't on anymore
but they should be:

just don't forget to remember the olden days, mis amigos.

now go enjoy the present!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

15 hours in a car

me, at our final destination, with a senior pic of a guy who i look like

When we left Grandma Bonnie's at 9am-ish yesterday morning, I figured I was gonna be okay with the next few hours.
I mean, I've done the Rexburg-->Utah, Utah-->Rexburg trip
about a bajillion times.

But that's only 8 hours.
Only 8. Double that and add in a few of these adventures:

A stop in Paul, Idaho. It was pretty quiet in the cemetery, nobody else was there except a guy mowing the lawn. Mom took the opportunity to talk about the resurrection. Then Caleb, completely serious, looks up at her and asks,
"On resurrection morning, will there be dead zombies rampaging?"
Yes, Caleb, dead zombies rampaging.
Has anybody lent "Day of the Dead" to him recently?
Please come forward.

Major rainstorm in mountains, lightning striking
right by the car. Ellie plugged her ears saying "Make the rain noise stop! I don't wanna heaw it!"
Mom had to pull over a couple of times cause we
just couldn't see. It was a tad scary.

The Burger King in Pendleton had no tomatoes, lettuce, chicken, or pickles. Soo what are we supposed to eat then, Mr.
Burger King? I thought you said we could have it our way.

A stop in Troutdale revealed that Ellie does not have the greatest
manners in truck stop bathrooms.
I'll only say this: there was an incident with
wet toilet paper, a few "you fiend's!" from
the madre which I think other people in the bathroom heard, and a poor woman getting
shoved out of the way of our little princess.

Bring on the trip home, baby.

I promise I only ate 2 aussie bites...

Thursday, August 5, 2010


Yes, 'tis true.
Ikey is gonna be across the hall from me again
in less than 24 hours.

You've done us all proud, Elder.

Welcome home!!!