Sore throats are so not the bomb.com. And whoever made up that phrase, well maybe they should have looked up bomb.com first and made sure it wasn’t some al-Qaeda fansite. Because some people are gullible…cough…and think anything with a “.com” after it is actually a URL! Although I dunno why anyone would think that way.
Um so my ears hurt a lot. They aren’t feeling stellar, haven’t been for a week or so. They are as plugged up as the dam that the Danish boy babysat. No bueno.
And my cough is close to “whooping” (hence the title), but only in the morning when the allergens are workin’ overtime. Then at night the throat monsters attack and I can’t swallow. So that’s why I’ve been heavily drugged on Sudafed/Aleve/Chloraseptic as of late. I’m sorry if I vandalized your car or swore in my sleep or…gulp…forgot to floss (that was an apology to my teeth, btw). YES. I just blamed drugs for my problems, on a family blog. I did I did I did. Sorrrry.
Lately on this here blog I have been waxing reminiscent. Whoa English major word. But sometimes, like now, at 11:30 at night, my stream of consciousness begs me to let loose a little bit and write what’s really going on in that grey matter. Particularly on the right side of the grey matter.
I’m stickin’ it to the man. And the man right now…is the stuff in my throat. Please dissolve soon so I can shleep. And let me write a happy list, mm kay?
1. Blueberry buckwheat pancakes with almond butter, say what? Yeah it’s THAT good, just go eat it and un-wrinkle your perplexed face (but don’t get me wrong, the wrinkles look good on you).
2. Trampolining at 10 o’clock at night, under the big dippah
3. Flowy dresses with fun patterns
4. Hitting appliances to make them work. What, you’ve never done it? Look me in the eye and tell me the top of your TV has never met the palm of your hand! Yeahhh, that’s what I thought.
5. 80’s hits, like: Don’t You Forget About Me, 867-5309, Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go (who doesn’t want to wake up to THAT? Honestly.)
6. Cheddar-cheesy Hallmark films. They make me cringe with over-joyed-ness sometimes. Especially the Christmas ones, oh man.
7. That bite in the air when you know autumn is coming…
8. When inspiration strikes, and it strikes you good. I’m talkin’ about when you are right about to fall asleep in a fog of cough medicine, staring up at the board slats underneath the bunk bed, and then you think, “Oh my gash! I know exactly what I’m going to do this semester!” Like a lightning storm in December, I tell ya.
9. Bon Appetit magazine. Oh and FOOD magazine( the Martha Stewart one). Better throw in any Rachael Ray, Barefoot Contessa, or Jamie Oliver Cookbook.
10. Spying on children while they color. They get really into it, their tongues sticking out, eyes slightly crossed, sometimes they even give the stick people voices. It’s awesome.