Wednesday, August 24, 2011

funny stuff etc.

(disclaimer: this is longish so I have inserted funny pictures from my tumblr to ensure you keep reading 'til the end. okay then)

Right now I am feeling a little craaazy because maybe I just got back from running and the endorphins are coursing through my vessels. Although it feels more like 7Up at the moment. Many times in my life I have done stupid-ish things after a run because I felt invincible. Then, hours, weeks, months, or years later, I facepalmed my stupidity. Join me!
  • (I'm pretty sure everyone's heard this story, but I think it's chilarious. I'm not sure which word I just combined with hilarious...I'll get back to you on that.) ANYWHO. Once after a particularly rough x-country practice, me and the Lizard were told by our coach to go home and eat a big plate of pasta with broccoli. You don't understand how much we did not want broccoli. Or pasta. We inhaled pasta most of the time. So what did we do? Just had her mom drive us down the road to Carl's Jr., where we both inhaled 2 burgers...each. One of the proudest moments of my life.
  • Once I called up a friend to help me with a really embarrassing assignment after I ran 3 miles. It was one of the most embarrassing things I ever had to do for 20 points and an A. But worth it in the end. If you want more of this story, you can ask me.
  • There was this one time I ran a 10k and accidentally ran an extra mile...so actually the crazy thing happened during my run. But oh well.
  • Then there was the Ragnar. I'm not even gonna talk about all the locomotive stuff from that race. But let me just say that I ran my first leg, sat in a car, ate too many bananas and larabars, slept on a sleeping bag in an unfinished basement on a cement floor, then ran up a hill in the dark at 12:30am when I really shouldn't have been running. But I did it. Crazysauce.
  • I remember one run in high school which I did on a summery night. Naturally, I was pretty hot after the run was over, so I simply jumped into the half-full kiddie pool in our backyard. In my running clothes. My dad came outside and gave me the weirdest look, and then went back in. Psh. He didn't know what he was missing!
As you can see, endorphins make me do pretty nutso things. But in the end they end up being really good things...so I guess what I'm trying to say is run instead of doing drugs. It's a natural high, and the consequences are a jillion times better.

So maybe this blog will end up being a good thing later down the road...because right now, as I'm writing it...it just feels like some half-crazed idea spawned by another run. Excuses, excuses.

Another funny thing I'd like to share is the google searches people have done to happen upon this blog. P.S. I love saying "happen upon." It makes me feel British, almost (if that wasn't stereotypical, I don't know what is). Here is a sampling:


redhead nerds

the truth about gingers
(a British person totally did this one, who else says "gingers" instead of "redheads"!!!!)
ugly coveralls
(wait, it gets better)
bob dylan can't sing

wearing those overalls (again with the overalls...)
pigtails redhead

fat redhead nerds (watch it)
redheads are my weakness
(oh really...)
barf meaning
(this one kills me!)
go back to mexico
(I will, someday)
Thanks to google my blog is being read by people in Sweden, The Netherlands, India, Brazil, France, Israel, Ukraine, Russia, Mexico, Argentina, and Punjab (that was the barf one...haha). Please make yourself known, lurkers!
And last but definitely not least, I'd like to introduce my dear friend Tessa. She and I have the greatest conversations. Here's a little taste of what I get every day on my phone.

me: "We found a rattlesnake and my uncle shot it three times. Ick."
TP: "I've never seen anything get shot besides the air."

TP: "Once again I think it's a for my own entertainment crush."
me: "Oh you mean like ____ and ____ and ___ were?"
TP: "Yeah....uh..."

Me: "We just went to Macey's and ate ice cream and talked about relationship problems."
TP: "Oh dear. Well a club should be made called dating drags."

TP: "I can't believe I forgot about that! [a funny incident which cannot be shared on the www]
me: how'd you forget a gem like that?!
tp: I don't know but it was funny when I got reminded.
Me: I have a funny bank. I make deposits into it regularly. Then I remember it later and withdraw.

me: Why'd she have to get pregnant?
tp: rude
me: I can't wait until you're pregnant and then when you can't hang out with me as much anymore I'll just say you're rude.
tp: haha and i'll do the same to you.
me: thanks! Glad we could be there for each other.

me: When you kiss someone it should be right after you eat ice cream or something sweet like that.
tp: Mm or chocolate! Not ice cream...it makes your lips cold and then they feel like they're kissing a dead person. Which is super funny when it isn't one of your first kisses with them.
me: maybe I should just say I'm allergic...but that would be a horrible lie because ice cream is my favorite food. boys and ice cream, that is.


tp [while watching sound of music]: The weeeee! scene just happened. So good. Along with the one right after, favorite things. Remind me to say weeee after my next first kiss.
me: hahhaha ok...if i"m there I'll remind you. Which might be awkward.

tp: I just changed another diaper...
me: Oh I remember those days!
tp: oh the joys of poop.
yeah....that happened.

tp: I just swam...swam is a loose term because I don't remember the last time I put my head under water.
me: That's the traditional way...otherwise it's called drowning.
tp: ahha that's quite true. By head up I just meant not in water...ever...
me: true.

1 comment:

funsizetessa said...

I just died laughing. This is the best post you've ever done. HA.